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It’s been a full on day today. I spent the day doing readings & the evening doing a service at Bankfoot Spiritualist church in Bradford. So I’m keeping to my blog challenge late in the evening & thinking about the 19 messages I’ve passed on to people. One of the things people are often surprised about is that, though they want only certain people to bring them messages, sometimes they get a message from a more distant person they have connected to. The person getting the message often asks why the particular person didn’t come. Or wonders why they wouldn’t come.

I know it’s disappointing. I know it can be upsetting. And I know that it doesn’t seem right that the people we have been closest to couldn’t or wouldn’t step close. I’ve felt all of those feelings waiting for my family members to connect with messages for me. After all, if they love you why wouldn’t they make the effort. Mediums can ask for significant people or specific people to come & connect. It’s wonderful that 8 times out of 10 the Spirit people can respond to that request & the person most wanted by the sitter communicates. But there are still times when, despite your best efforts, the person who steps forward is not who the sitter wants.

I questioned my Guides a lot about this. Especially when I was waiting to hear from the people who I’d lost. Or when I heard from Gladys, the lady who was my training officer in my very first job so many years ago. I’ve sat in readings trying to find a yes to encourage the medium, hoping that I would recognise the Spirit person & wishing it could be my Mum or my Dad instead. What the Guides told me time & time again was that the people really close to me had to make adjustments to being in the Spirit World. That they had to detach from wanting to speak to me like they had when they were alive. To the day my Dad died I was his little girl & he was still trying to suggest ways in which I should run my life. Right now to my Dad I am still his little girl. So he very rarely comes to give me a message. He (& now I) understands that I have to make the best of my life according to my own free will choices. He can’t influence my decisions – even if I’m going to fall flat on my face.

Until the Spirit loved one can speak in the message without actually saying what you should do they are still too attached to the Earth journey. They are helped & supported by family & Guides to find a more detached view. No less loving, no less concerned for us yet recognising our independence of choice. Often they send a proxy (my Granddad comes on behalf of my Dad). The Spirit who steps forward will help to bridge the gap between both people so that comfort, confirmation & acknowledgement can be given on each side. It is also true that Spirit people find other ways to connect with you. There are certain songs that connect me to my loved ones. It’s amazing how often I hear those songs, seemingly randomly, just at the moment I need a loving boost. Or someone down here uses a phrase or two from someone ‘up there’. Or an advertising hoarding, a bus number plate, a google search pulls a memory of a loved on in front of me.

I know that when we are both ready I will get a direct message from my Dad through a medium. Until then I will continue to do my best to connect other people with their loved ones because I understand how much it matters.

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